SPY-FI

My imaginary friend, Timmy, had just woken up from a 10 hour "nap". 

Timmy: I’ve got a hell lot of things to tell you

Me: What is it?

Timmy: What? Do you have to know everything right away?

Me: Okay, tell me tomorrow then.

Timmy: I will think about it.

Me: Oh come on, what else have you got to do?

Timmy: What? You think I sit doing nothing all day?

Me: Yep

Timmy: Have you been spying on me?

TIRED OF BEING YOUR FRIEND

I'm tired of being the one who listens.
I'm tired of being the one who calls.
The one who ends silences.
The one who breaks down walls.

The one who never shows anger.
The one who never asks.
And the one who will remember
But wear a smiling mask.

Old friends are better than new.
They know you without needing to ask.
But I wish that sometimes you
would, even if you know, still ask.

I'm tired of the distances.
Of having to work at keeping it alive.
Excuse me my absences:
I may - or may not - be back in a while.

Crushes....errrr... Marriages

My imaginary friend Mr Timmy and I were watching a movie the other day. Richard Gere was chasing Bruce Willis on a railway track. As always Timmy had a question for me.

“Why don’t they take their guns out?”

As always, I had an explanation.

“I guess they like each other”
Timmy looked satisfied. I was thinking, about Bruce Willis.

“You know Timmy, I might marry Bruce Willis”

“Rini you just said Johnny Depp yesterday. Cant you give a guy a week?”

“ Boy, when I say I have a crush on Mr Good Looking, my sensory powers translate it to I married Mr GL”

“Is there any good in that?”

“Yeah we have established a relationship you see!”

“I repeat. What’s the good in that?”

“I will tell you what’s good about it Timmy. When I go to a place and see a house he owns I’d say ‘He’s giving this one to me’”

“That makes some sense”

“It does. So every other street I walk on, I will have another house waiting to be mine”

“Cool! So you get a crush when you know a guy is rich?”

“Of course not! You don’t marry a guy for his money. You marry him for his short hair, clean eyes and cause he lets you in the front door when his Mom’s still there”

“Attractive. So money doesn’t matter”

“It does for divorces”

“You divorce someone when he is penniless”

“That’s inhuman Timmy! But you don’t divorce someone when he is growin' money trees in his backyard cause he ran out of space in his front garden”

“Amazing Rini! You happen to know any female imaginary pals in the neighborhood?”

“Let’s look around Timmy boy”

“I want her to be sensible, hate her real-life pal and make fun of him”

“ You won’t find another one like you around!”

“I know; that’s why I remain a fancy pal. I am too good to be real”

I didn’t say anything. I decided that when it came to creating fancy pals who thought the world about you, I was a total failure. Timmy seemed to think the inferno about me.

LOOK FOR ME WHEN I AM GONE

Look for me when I am gone.

Not for all the turmoil and problems I caused in your life,

And not for being the woman you wanted me to be;

But as someone who truly loved you once and that was forever.

As someone who gave you a reason to live your life,

As someone who laughed with you, cried and shared your emotions.

Look for me when I am gone.

Not for showing lady-like qualities in front of your friends,

The tantrums that made you lose your temper every time,

The fights that made you hate me every while;

But as someone who could spend the whole day waiting for you

Or when you were unwell,

as someone who stayed up all night with her prayers, praying for you.

Look for me when I am gone.

Not for having the patience you wanted me to have,

Not for being perfect all the time;

Remember me as someone who could go to any extreme

if she could have you in the end.

Who could fight with anyone if you chose never to leave her hand.

Look for me when I am gone,

For you would miss me.

Don’t worry, I won’t be far away,

I will wait for you until you come,

hold my hand and kiss me.....

Agar Mein Panchi Hoti Toh Kitna Achcha Hota

Agar mein panchi hoti

Toh kitna achcha hota,

Puri dharti apni lagti

Khula aasmaan nyaara lagta..

Ud jaati pankh khol apne

Kshitij chum jaati aur poore hote mere sapne..

Agar mein panchi hoti

Toh kitna achcha hota.....

Agar mein nadi hoti

Toh kitna achcha hota,

Beh jaati apne sapnon ke duniya mein

Phir bhi rastaa mera hota..

Phatharon se takraati, pahaadon se girti

Par mein needar ho kar aage badhti;

Intezaar kar raha hai Saagar mera

Mein awashya uske saath jaa kar milti..

Agar mein nadi hoti

Toh kitna achcha hota.....

Agar mein varsha hoti

Toh kitna achcha hota,

Idhar baras jaati, udhar garaj jaati

Par apne sang khushiyaali laati..

Rok paaye mujhe na aandhi na toofan

Ghusse se garjoongi

Dharti ko meri zaroorat hai

Jamkar nischay mein barsoongi..

Agar mein varsha hoti

Toh kitna achcha hota.....

Agar mein ek ped hoti

Toh kitna achcha hota,

Upar badey badey phal lagte

Niche aadmi sukun se sota..

Sabki sahaayata mein zaroor karti

Mann chaahe toh khaa le mere aam

ya jala de meri deh aur paa le sukh kisi ek shaam..

Agar mein ek ped hoti

toh kitna achcha hota.....

Lekin mein hoon ek aam manushya

Hain mere hazaaron sapne

Na taakat hai meri nadi jaisi

Na saahas hai mere ped jaise..

Chaahiye toh mujhe sirf ek cheez

har kadam pe ho saath mere apne.....

Agar mein panchi hoti

Toh kitna achcha hota.........

Men Are From Mars, Women From Venus... Really??

I am not a cricket player. All I have for credit are the little cricket games I played with my elder brother as a kid. So when my neighbours planned to form a cricket team for a local cricket tournament, I didn’t think much of it. But… I didn’t think they would not even consider women in their team. They didn’t know if any of us were interested, had experience or were good players. They assumed it is going to be a men’s only event. Now that, more than irk me, shocked me. Yes, that’s how it is in international cricket. But I thought local matches were more casual, more gender free-friendly. The year is 2011 and we still think fights and sports are for men and cooking and sewing are for women?

When I asked if I could be in the team – just out of curiosity in fact – I was generously offered a cheerleader’s place. They meant it for fun. But repeatedly when the comment came from every guy i interacted with, in the neighbourhood, I was again, puzzled. This was not anymore a joke. They seriously could not even imagine a woman as a player. It is because the cricket ball is too hard for a fragile little woman’s soft skin, I gathered.

If I say more, I will only be branded a desperate feminist. I say ‘only’ because that would only make the depth of my words and concerns seem unimportant. I am not asking for justice. I am not thinking of a different picture where all is fair. I am not in the least asking to be in the team (ahh, i am no good at it)! I am just realizing discrimination is just another norm, an accepted reality of the world. It would always exist in subtle forms unquestioned. Wouldn’t it?

How Do You Feel.....

How do you feel…

when you just can’t make someone understand your point of view?

How do you feel… 

when that someone is still the most important person in your life?

How do you feel… 

when you can’t afford to give up on that someone?

How do you feel… 

when you just can’t feel anything anymore?