1) First thing, Saw Mukesh Ambani's Antilla while we were landing. Now THAT's a building I wouldn't mind a plane crashing into. ;D
2) MIchelle is now the tallest man in India.
3) Accidentally said I was a Gandhi fan. Now have to mention it in every.speech.all.the.f^%#@!^.time. What i think about Gandhi is Nobel Peace Prize: Me = 1, Him = 0.
4) Indians
everywhere are calling my wife Kali. I knew Michelle was strong, but didn't
realise Indians thought of her as an Indian goddess. Yeppieee :)
5) Who are these Mantri Developers and why does my Blackberry have 300 sms's from them offering to sell me an apartment?
6) Researched a lot about India in Google before going there and I am disappointed that nobody offered me cow urine.. (sob..sob)
7) Just
got off the phone with a young lady from some HDFC. Have secured major
loans to get over the recession crisis. This trip is already proving a big time win. :D
8) I'm gifting Manmohan Singh a personality development and public speaking course with Deepak Chopra.
9) Mumbai is a fine city. It reminds me of New Orleans post Katrina.
10) I hate the Pakistanis. They keep saying the damn N word all the time.
11) There's no way I'm giving you guys access to David Headley. I saw what your cops did with Jamaal in Slumdog Millionaire.
12) I'm not running for a second term if I've to deal with this Rahul chap. what a torture that would be!! phewww...
13) No India, I cannot give you a UNSC seat through an OBC quota. (saaaaaryyy!)
14) Btw, why are you so keen on getting a Security Council seat when you can't even stop the Maoists from taking over 10 states?
15) That American companies' innovation skill is proved by the invention of McAloo Tikki burger.
16) When I ask for cheese they give me something called paneer. When I repeat "CHEESE" they start smiling. This is pissing me off.
17) Learnt a new phrase today - Zindagi jhand phir bhi ghamand
18) All I have to do is smile, say namaste and make an Amitabh Bachchan reference to make Indians dance on my finger tips.
